Playing with guns...

It's always pleasure to visit home on annual visits since I went for Bachelor studies. It was summer time and full 2 months vacation. Yippiii ... I was very well welcomed. I wondered when I used to stay here this was totally different place... no special considerations... no welcoming ... nothing.. and Now things are different.

Everyone in neighborhood, whenever they see me, they talk... says few nice appreciative words ...aah ... it feels good ... it feels damn good ... :) ... In small town like where I belong to, one paradise is roof top access... though the houses are not multi-storied buildings but every house has a roof top... in the evening time everyone comes to roof and whenever they see one another they greet and talk ... specially children and housewives...

Thus the best time to chat old buddies is to make your presence visible on the roof top and refresh childhood memories. After quite some time, me and my brother were at our roof to see changes in neighborhood ... few new buildings ... somewhat new roads .... and if you stretch your vision to further horizon, you can see construction on new telephone tower.

"hey neha didi", suddenly my ear heard these words and my eyes automatically turned to a known human figure. Before I could have said anything in return, he said.

"When did you come from your college? ... Long time haven't seen you !!!"

"hey Lavi " I exclaimed with smile. Lavi's home was next to our house. he was quite younger to me, around 6 or 7 years I think. Okay let me calculate, when I was in BTech 2nd year, he was in high School, so yeah around 5-6 years.

"Yeah, I just came yesterday, my exams are over.. so having summer vacation right now."

"You have forgotten you home?..eh .. you don't come very frequently" He said with little complaining and more teasing.

" Naah, its really tough to come when session is on.. so only can afford to come in vacations... So, hows your studies... you should be in 9th class or something..." I asked recalling my memories at fullest.

"No... I am in 10th just finished with High School Board exams..."He said

"Okay" I replied...

"Bhaiya you know, I have learned how drive a tractor." he said happily.

I suddenly realized my brother was with me too while all this conversation.

"Hmm ..mmm ", my brother said bluntly.

"A tractor, ain't you too Young to drive a tractor?" I was a bit surprise.

"Tractor is nothing, Neha didi, my uncle even taught me how to fire a rifle, he has got new rifle." he said proudly.

I was surprised... though its not too surprising to have rifles and guns at home (licensed ones) for the sake of own safely... but few people just have it to show off... that have got a licensed rifle. its really expensive and it certainly increases status in society ... similar to have a car ... say Mercedes....

"Hmm... " I was not in favor of letting a kid learn how to fire bullets... that simply doesn't make sense...

"Bhaiya you know, one of my relative, my aunty, ... she shot herself using my uncle's rifle. she just went inside the room ...locked the doors... sat on the floor stretching her legs perpendicular to the body.... pointed tip of the gun to under her chin.. and triggered rifle from her leg's thumb.... One shot ... 2 seconds and game over"...his explanation was so vital that whole sequence ran into my retina..

Terrific...Terrific... I shivered even thinking of it... and look at him ... he's telling this story as if he is praising the dead lady for her bravery ... as if he is praising the technique how wisely she used rifle to shot herself... damn it ...

"Oh, this is bad and sad of course ... one should not have such dangerous weapons at home. it's a real tragedy." I pity on the dead lady.

" But didi, you she how she used the gun, in one shot ... and not a single chance to be alive ... everything will be over" he said.

My mood turned off. I wanted to protest, but my brother squeezed my hand indicating leave it ... you can not make him understand that this exercise is bad. " why are you worried... its his parents duty to show what is right ... what is wrong... when they don't care and they themselves are encouraging what can you do... you can't change his mentality in one conversation." my brother whispered to me...

I understood... I wanted to help... but how do you really know that you are actually helping .... I left it there... may be its not in my reach.

"Dinner ready, come down", my mom called both of us, me and brother downstairs. Conversation with Lavi got over at once... we said bye to him and came down ...

"wow what a delicious food, mom... after so long ... this is heaven!!" I said. Mom smiled...

"yeah yeah ... i know... you eat well so that you ll have energy to study when you go back" mom said.

"when board exam result's ll come out... soon I think... this time so many kids had appeared for the exams from our neighborhood..." she said.

---------------------------------xxx---------------------------

One month passed since I have come to home, one more month to go... Now I was getting a little bored... coz nothing to do much ... just sit ... eat ... watch tv... talk ... and sleep....

Three of us me, brother and mom are together again for dinner...

"tonight board result will be out, I think" mom said.

"yeah...rather its out", brother added more information.

"wow.. so how was result" I asked curiously.

"As usual, over all result was 29% this year. Mahi, Sarita, Neeraj and Abhinav, they all passed. Mahi and Neeraj first class, Sarita second class and Abhinav I don't know... may be first or second class", brother said.

"Hmm quite good... who else remaining... what about Rinku?" I asked

"Oh he is still in 9th, his board exam will be next year .... yeah ... bad news is Lavi failed... " he said

"What!!!! is it ??" both me and mom exclaimed.

"yep, I dunno why and how, but even almost all have passed, the poor guy failed... " he said.

"oh po...o...r "...our conversation stopped as we heard a sound... somewhat like a pot had fallen ... but felt a peculiar sound ... like .... like .... a gun shot.

Mom: What was that ?

Me: !!!!

Brother: a gun shot.... nothing new.... there might be someone's marriage... it happens...

"oh", we thought calming down ourselves ....

Mom: It is ? .... Is some one crying ? I can hear some one crying ...

She stood up with an electric shot, and ran towards the window from where the sound was coming ... we followed her...

"Its definitely something... see Lavi's aunty is crying... Gaurav you go and see ... see what has happened?" mom said in horror.

My brother immediately headed to Lavi's house. We were left back at home ...puzzled... What we could hear were increasing cries more and more prominent and gathering people at Lavi's house.

Brother came back after 10 mins, he looked troubled and pathetic as if he has seen some ghost.

We: What!!

Brother: its him.. he shot himself... Lavi shot himself...

"God..." we were speechless... surprised ...aghast... horrified... and it was just unbelievable...

Soon police came... and house was soaked into deep deep sadness. Mom and dad, both went to his house to console the family. Me and my brother left at home, at our roof top, watching his house in dark clear night.

Me: I cant believe this has happened ... can't believe he is dead!!!

Brother: I went there ... his aunty came running, crying badly and pointed me to the room where he was... I entered... I saw him... his body took two jerks as if he wanted to say something... I ran to him... but I stopped... I couldn't touch him... I came out for help...and .... and ..... perhaps I was the last one to see him alive...

A long silence crept into our conversation... no words from either side ... we both sat silently for a long time... and then I broke the silence...

Me: How?

Brother: He took his uncle's rifle....went inside the room ... sat on the floor stretching his legs perpendicular to the body.... pointed tip of the gun to under his chin.. and triggered rifle from his leg's thumb.... One shot ... and............................................


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